Dean's Thoughts on Entertainment

Supporting Actor of the Week

Vincent Schiavelli



Vincent Schiavelli is easily recognizable as the tall ghostly creature that has haunted his way through many freaky roles throughout his long career. I thought of him after watching Death to Smoochy (Note review from yesterday) and also his role as Paragon in the Pilot for Heat Vision and Jack. He has probably been featured in over half of the cool campy horror films in the last two decades, and his role in Ghost was just amazing. I am going to urge my readers to download Heat Vision and Jack this week, because it is just hilarious, and “Knowledge is Power…For Real!”



Heat Vision and Jack Review



I shouldn’t leave you in the dark, because only a few of you will know what this is by name. Heat Vision and Jack is the spawn of Ben Stiller’s desire to return to TV with something even more ridiculous than the Ben Stiller Show which only was funny like 3 times in its whole TV run. But this one was doomed from the start but was some of the campiest paydirt that I have ever seen. The premise is that Jack Black was an astronaut who got too close to the sun and he is now “three times smarter than the smartest man alive” (when the sun is shining), NASA wants to hone his powers so they release Ron Silver (playing himself) to capture him. Their first attempt to capture him misfired and made his friend (Owen Wilson) turn into a motorcycle to become Jack’s sidekick. As they run from Ron Silver they head continuously into adventure. The opening credits are worth repeat viewings alone, as Jack punches a werewolf, and says the catchphrase which I quoted above. Christine Taylor and Ben Stiller himself both appear, but it is Jack Black who makes the show gold. A must see.



National Security Review

The worst Buddy Cop movie in the history of Buddy Cop movies, hands down. Martin Lawrence stars in his most irritating character ever as he exemplifies every bad black stereotype and then enhances them, and I honestly have no good comparisons to make about how much you just yearn for him to die. Percy from The Green Mile is probably close, but even he doesn’t do justice. I couldn’t stand the movie because the whole movie you are just praying for Martin to die, or reform, or somehow stop talking long enough to cool the screaming pain in your head, but you know that as the star you will never get your wish. Steve Zahn does a great job as the cop who is driven insane by Lawrence, but you can’t really enjoy him because of the overshadowing incessant aggravating presence of the star. I really can’t say enough about how much Martin Lawrence sucked, or at least his writing sucked, but someone should pay for this. This movie should never be seen, not even Steve Zahn can save this movie, and I will rampage if this gets picked for a sequel.