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An avid movie collector reviews movies, games, and TV shows for the common man, among other things. Spoiler Free

Tuesday, September 30, 2003

Blog Blocked

Apparently my last few Blogs didn't happen so I will recap.

According to the Buzz Bin (note the added link), Underworld has had both a sequel and a prequel get the green light for development. There are way too many eggs in this basket and I don't think anyone is excited by this franchise at all.

I joined GameFly.com which allows me to rent games in a similar manner to Netflix. Expect more game reviews, first up will be Hunter: The Reckoning Wayward. A blend of Resident Evil and Gauntlet Legends.

Sunday, September 28, 2003

Flea Market Moolah

A slew of 1 Dollar videos to make my day.

The Birdcage - A ironic find since I was discussing it on Friday night with CJ.

The Sandlot

Star Trek 1+2 - I haven't seen them but I wanted to, still better than renting them.

Apollo 13

Out for Justice - Another guilty pleasure Seagal film.

And Robin Williams Live on Broadway on DVD for 5 bucks. Booyah

Friday, September 26, 2003

ChuckleHound caught bein' dumb.

I was getting tired of Chucklehound low-balling all my movies so I put it to the test. Check This

Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Rings (PG-13)
(Adventure/Fantasy)
Starring Elijah Wood and Liv Tyler
Also Featuring Ian McKellen, Viggo Mortensen, and Cate Blanchett
Directed by Peter Jackson
Screenplay by J.R.R. Tolkien and Frances Walsh

Projected Budget Range: $100-109 Million
Planned Release Date: December

Projected Box Office Receipts:
$20.40 million (Opening Weekend) Actual - $66 Million
$159.08 million (Total Domestic Gross) Actual - $313 Million Domestic, $860 Worldwide

Chance of getting Oscar Nomination: 29% - Got some
Chance of winning at least one Oscar: 1% - Got some

Hell Yes, they blew it hard.
Top Five Over-Rated Actresses (Inspired in Part by what CJ copped out of doing)

1. Julia Roberts - Not attractive, decent at best. Too much of a storkid (Some of you are familiar with the term, its a birdlike thinness to the legs and neck)
2. Heather Graham - Probably one of the worst actresses in the business, although in her defense she is often in ditzy roles.
3. Leelee Sobieski - Something bothers me, can't quite narrow it down for a description.
4. Charlize Theron - Yes, Attractive, BUT I find myself liking her less with each movie release. An interview on Conan O'Brien also left me with no respect for her.
5. Jennifer Lopez - Her stock already plummeted, but I felt like throwing my stone too.

Top 5 Under-Rated Actresses

1. Alyson Hannigan - Yes, I know I just came off a Buffy kick. But after seeing her play an evil version of herself in Season 3 I really wanted to see her in roles other than the squirrelly cute girl next door. IMDB has nothing on her plate after American Wedding so I am sad.
2. Sarah Silverman - Very funny and cool, but only seems to get in movies made by her friends. Shame
3. Thora Birch - She's doing OK, and she purposefully stepped out of big movies. But some mainstream parts would be nice.
4. Joan Allen - I haven't seen her in a part I didn't like. The perfect strong woman character, and plays the mom well.
5. Embeth Davidtz - She's the best female to be in your horror movie, whether its Army of Darkness, Fallen, or 13 Ghosts, she'll rock it out.

I almost had Carla Gugino and my friend George was pushing for Jennifer Tilly. And Joan Cusack always deserves praise. We'll give them honorable mentions.

Thursday, September 25, 2003

Buffy Season 3 Review

As you can notice I have been watching a lot of full seasons lately which may cause you to ask yourself what kind of a life I have. I don't have one, and now that I am out of Buffy Seasons I am depressed and alone. Buffy Season 3 is a step down from season 2 but a smallish step. The effects and fights are improved but they added too many characters, and it spread things a bit thin, now less of an ensemble show but more Buffy with occasional friends (and honestly I don't think anyone likes Buffy the most). Seth Green stepped up to a full time spot, a new slayer and watcher as well as new boyfriends and there was just too little time in the show to give them all purpose. Some episodes you would wonder why Xander would be doing a certain thing and it occurs to you that without it he would be entirely absent from the show. Which is probably part of the reason you don't always catch Seth Green he usually got cut first, followed by Charisma Carpenter. I think it was still deeply enjoyable, just a few less scenes with your favorite characters.

Interestingly, after all this Buffy I am actually considering buying the new Video game (Buffy Chaos Bleeds) where you can play as Buffy, Faith, Xander, Willow, or Spike (and I hear something about the Ventriloquist dummy???) and rock some house. Oh, and some multi-player (shame I don't have any friends to play with).

On a high note, I can now review movies again. Until I find a new TV show to watch through and obsess about. 24 Season 3 starts soon. I'll be OK.

Wednesday, September 24, 2003

Ebay VHS Lot

I get paid to take surveys online, I don't get much but every few months I get enough to buy some VHS lot. Here's my latest

1. Arachnophobia - Remember my top ten movies that start with "A". Oh yeah.
2. The Craft - Made witchcraft popular in High School. Fairuza Balk at her freakest, and remember the black girl from Half Baked?
3. Dirty Dancing - Yeah, more of a girl pick. But I like having girl picks that are guy friendly, this one is...kind of.
4. The Ghost and the Darkness - Kilmer and Douglas vs Lions, alright! Actually I don't remember if I like this one.
5. War of the Roses - Danny DeVito again making a dark comedy, this one being one of his best. Michael Douglas and Kathleen Turner are great, and evil.

I also got the 2nd Ace Ventura and One Fine Day. They are for the selling. Interested??

Tuesday, September 23, 2003

Inspired by Dave's Blog

My favorite TV shows.

And once again for those who are new or forgetful, my lists are non-sequential. It is hard enough to narrow things down so much, to place them in some kind of actual order would give me stomach ulcers.

1. 24 - Best action/suspense show ever.
2. News Radio - My favorite sitcom, mostly because of the interplay between Dave Foley, Maura Tierney, and Phil Hartman. Andy Dick, Stephen Root (Squirrely guy from Office Space), and a pre-Man Show/Fear Factor Joe Rogan round out the hilarious cast. Shortened by the death of Phil Hartman the show ended after 5 seasons.
3. Mr. Show - Sketch Comedy at its best from two gifted comedy writers (forgive them for the Ben Stiller Show). The Mr. Show movie, Run Ronnie Run, just came out...watch it.
4. Buffy, The Vampire Slayer - It may be too early for me to add this, but I really liked the second season and the third season is coming together. Makes me dream of killing creatures, which is nice.
5. Tenacious D - Another HBO comedy show, spawned Jack Black's career and contains some of the funniest songs and moments in TV history. Another short lived show, I think my tastes must be unique, or stupid.
6. Simpsons - Both funny and intelligent, this show is on everyone's list so I need not explain.
7. Family Guy - Funnier and harsher than the Simpsons but pushed too many buttons for network TV, pissed off Fox and got canned.
8. Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law - Adult Swim's finest show that for some reason isn't being made anymore. Japanimation has nothing to offer in the face of this and things like Space Ghost. Adult Swim sucks now and that official.
9. X-Men, the Animated Series - Besides Wolverine standing over someone about to stab and being knocked off (IN EVERY EPISODE) this is the best show I watched as a kid. Honorable mention for Thundercats but I forget most of that show...so...not on my list.
10. Brisco County Jr./Jack of all Trades - Bruce Campbell!!!! Weekly!!!!! Yaaaaahh!!!!!!Cancelled?!?!?!?!?Man...........

Wow, my list is weird. Feel free to ignore the rest of my posts.
Buffy Season 2 Review

As I said before a vast improvement over Season 1. Season 2 begins what is to be a beautiful escapist TV show. The characters except for the evil female vampire Drucilla have all been revamped (note the pun) and they no longer suck. Plus an episode with John Ritter was a nice rememberance a few days after his death. Although the storylines and such are still weakish they don't really matter too much, the fun is in the characters and the simple world they live in which you wouldn't mind living in too. Of course, I would take up a lot of defense classes and carry a sword, random people die a lot.

Monday, September 22, 2003

New finds at the Pawn Shops.

VHS And DVD Paydirt

Bedazzled DVD for 4 bucks! - Brendan Fraser is funny, and Elizabeth Hurley is sexy British. The story of one man's attempts to get a new life in trade for his soul to the devil, and the devil is sneaky.

Sleepy Hollow VHS for 3 bucks! - Tim Burton is one of my favorites, this being his better adaptation of a previous movie (Planet of the Apes). Johnny Depp is good as the investigating Icabod Crane, and don't miss Christopher Walken as the freaky headless horseman (yes you see his head in flashbacks and such). Nice twists, good show.

How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days DVD - Another of my girlfriends additions, could be good...possibly.
Buffy Season 1 - Reviewed

Season 1 of Buffy was overall very poor. However, since I am half way through the second season I can say it improves. The main culprit is the characters, instead of quirks they have character flaws that drive you up the wall. Cordelia (I may have taken liberties in the spelling) is attractive but brings nothing else enjoyable to the show, I couldn't wait for her to step off screen. Xander is developed into a younger whinier version of Chandler from Friends. Buffy goes back and forth between brilliant and extremely ditzy, and Willow is too nerdy. Only Angel was consistently not annoying. The first season is only to be watched to get the back story for the thoroughly improved second season. All of the characters have been tweaked to have only quirks as needed and the addition of a new interesting villian (Spike) and Seth Green are great strides towards good.

24 Season 2 Reviewed

Warning: Do Not Watch before needing sleep, or if Pregnant this is a drug of heavy potency.
Warning: Do Not Watch Season 2 Before Season 1

OK, Warnings aside, best show ever. Once again I can tell you little so as to not sour your enjoyment when you watch it, and you must watch it. Just as good as the first season, maybe better its so hard to compare. All of the acting is stepped up because of the popularity every random supporting actor is recognizable, although less big names slid by for cameos. Action Packed, I can tell no more.

Warning: Season 3 starts soon, catch up so you can enjoy.
Top Ten Movies Starting with the Letter “A”
1. Amadeus – Brilliant Drama from Milos Forman, F. Murray Abraham Stars
2. Almost Famous – Cameron Crowe’s finest hour, makes me want to be a journalist
3. Army of Darkness – Sam Raimi and Bruce Campbell mix so many genres into pure gold
4. American Beauty – Kevin Spacey captures the mid-life crisis, and Wes Bentley looks at bags
5. American History X – Edward Norton plays the ultimate Neo-Nazi, and somehow makes you feel for them.
6. Abyss – One of the best sci-fi movies, and Ed Harris is always good.
7. Another You – Gene Wilder and Richard Pryor always rule, and yodeling
8. Aliens – Another good sci-fi but with a bit more teeth, two conjoining sets of them.
9. Arachnophobia – John Goodman as the cowboy exterminator, and Jeff Daniels in one of his better non-comedic roles.
10. Arlington Road – Tim Robbins is eerie, if only Jeff Bridges could have been cast elsewhere, like White Squall 2. It would have ruled if someone like Kurt Russell got the part instead.

Saturday, September 20, 2003

This Week's Haul

Pretty good day for yard sales, with a payoff of 5 new VHS movies and one DVD. I also got about 50 classic Nintendo Power magazines, I think they will have a good resale value. Anyway on to the movie loot.

Jacob's Ladder
Tim Robbins is trippin' after his time in Vietnam, A good freaky Psychological movie. Apparently, the Silent Hill video games are heavily influenced by this movie among others. Check it out.

Death Becomes Her
A really fun demented movie about these two women who drink from a fountain of youth and find that they can't die, however they still bare the damages. So spinning Meryl Streep's head around gives her a good wobbly neck. It feels like a Danny DeVito like movie, but this one comes from another of my favorite directors, Robert Zemeckis.

Dire Straits' On The Night, and The Videos
Two videos of one of the greatest 80's bands and a showcase of Mark Knopfler's brilliant fingerwork on guitar. Mesmerizing.

The Graduate
Dustin Hoffman is one of the greatest actors of all time, this movie is all him. He plays a young college graduate who finds himself being seduced endlessly by his father's friend's wife. Its just funny, and it launched Hoffman's career.

Sleeping Beauty on DVD
Honestly, I don't remember much of this movie. But 10 bucks for a Special Edition Disney DVD is a good buy. I was going to buy Anger Management too, but this cursed woman grabbed it first. Blast, now I have to rent it.
Supporting Actor(s) of the Week

Warwick Davis, Verne Troyer, Tony Cox, and Debbie Lee Carrington

I didn’t choose to split the supporting actor of the week section because the four of them together equaled a normal actor, but because these vertically challenged actors together are the heads of a beautiful world of actors known as “the Midgets”. Warwick Davis made them great and was the first midget to hold a starring role as the lovable Ewok in Return of the Jedi (actually all of them were in Return of the Jedi except Verne). He then went on to starring roles in Willow and the Leprechaun series. As Warwick grows older a younger actor steps up to the plate, the even smaller Verne Troyer has been featured in many movies most notably the role of Mini-Me in the Austin Powers series, make sure to catch him as the portable assassin in Hard Cash. And who can forget the foul-mouthed midget from Friday and Me, Myself, and Irene. Tony Cox is the most recognized black midget and his size doesn’t keep him from being intimidating although the bricks and nun-chucks help. I tried to think of a notable female midget, and without referencing Willow I struggled. However, if you remember Total Recall there was a wonderful young prostitute midget Debbie Lee Carrington who has been in several movies (guess who played the penguin in Batman Returns?) and was in the “Stand In” episode of Seinfeld. This rounds out our cast of brilliant tiny people, don’t neglect to praise them, and hopefully the enhanced world of digital creation won’t ruin their job opportunities. Stupid Hobbitses, Yoda, Dobby, and Gollum (All Played by non-midgets).

Warwick Davis



Verne Troyer



Tony Cox



Debbie Lee Carrington

Thursday, September 18, 2003

Bulletproof Monk Reviewed

OK, so it wasn't brilliant. It was however enjoyable despite the existance of zany wire work which has a tendency to infuriate me (as some of you know). What excited me most though was that Seann William Scott didn't suck at all, and this new movie coming out with The Rock and Christopher Walken might be good too. I think it is called the Rundown, let me check on that. Yeah, that's it. Anyway, Chow is getting old but he still rocks out pretty hard. Overall, the action scenes were weak and too wire oriented, however the comedy and drama worked enough for it to be worth a watching.

Buffy Update

I am 4 episodes into the first season of Buffy, and I must say it is disappointing. All of the characters are too simple and overdone, and it feels like a children's movie with mature themes. I hope (and hear) that it gets better especially in the 2nd and 3rd seasons. I pray that it does.

Wednesday, September 17, 2003

Deliciously New Things

Alright, this weekend was all rained out for some good flea marketing, but I did find some good things in some of my other avenues of video delight.

Identity - John Cusack in a horror/suspense movie??? Worth watching for that reason alone. Ray Liotta plays his usual Liotta which is still great, and great turns by Amanda Peet and John C. McGinley (See 1st Supporting actor of the week). I don't want to give anything away but a good twist on a very Agatha Christie like story.

Bulletproof Monk - Yeah, I bought it. I don't know why I feel so compelled to see it. I like Chow Yun-Fat, and adding some Stifler should be funny right?... I'll tell you if it is any good later.

Chicago - My girlfriend wanted this one. I have an intense hatred for Richard Gere, but I will give it a try. At least I will like Queen Latifah, I mean...who wouldn't.

I also scored the first three seasons of Buffy: The Vampire Slayer for less than 60 bucks for my friend CJ. I am going to watch through them since he believes it to be brilliant, and my friend Weigel agrees. A future review on that will come as well.

Sunday, September 14, 2003




Supporting Actor of the Week

Keith David

Another man who can only make a movie better, whether it is one of John Carpenter’s wacky sci-fi films (The Thing, They Live) or the new Chris Rock movie (Head of State). He is a great moral tough guy as seen in They Live and Spike Lee’s Clockers, and he even excelled as the Islamic Priest in Pitch Black. More recently he was even able to voice of the President in the futuristic animation movie Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within. You know you recognize him, now remember his name.


Friday, September 12, 2003

I just finished the Second Season of 24...I haven't slept in two days. Best show ever. Bedtime.
My Action Lists have been very Male Centric so...

Top Fifteen Kick-@$$ Women
1. Sigourney Weaver - Alien 1-4
2. Milla Jovovich - Resident Evil, Fifth Element, Messenger
3. Cynthia Rothrock - Tiger Claws, Lady Dragon
4. Michelle Yeoh - Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon,
5. Mira Sorvino - Replacement Killers, Mimic
6. Diane Lane - Murder at 1600, Judge Dredd
7. Bridget Fonda - Point of No Return, Tomorrow Never Dies
8. Gina Gershon - Face/Off, Bound, Black and White
9. Angelica Huston - Ice Pirates, Swashbuckler, Witches
10. Natasha Henstridge - Species 1+2, Ghosts of Mars, She Spies
11. Angelina Jolie - Tomb Raider 1+2
12. Sandra Bullock - Judge Dredd, Murder by Numbers, Speed
13. Carrie-Anne Moss - Matrix 1+2, Mission to Mars, Memento
14. Demi Moore - G.I.Jane, Charlie's Angels 2
15. Pam Grier - Foxy Brown, Jackie Brown, Ghosts of Mars

Thursday, September 11, 2003

Time for some more lists

All these fights are one-on-one or by small parties, epic battles like Lord of the Rings are not eligible.

Top Ten Fight Scenes (Hand-to-Hand)
1. Return of the Dragon (Chuck Norris Fight)
2. Legend of Drunken Master (Final Battle in the Steel Mill)
3. Rocky 4 (Drago Fight)
4. Operation Condor 2 (Evil Demon Women Fight)
5. Matrix (Neo vs Agent Smith in Subway)
6. Bloodsport (Final Battle)
7. Karate Kid (Crane Unleashed)
8. Rumble in the Bronx (Hideout Arcade Fight)
9. Tango and Cash (Prison Washroom Fight)
10. They Live (Dirty Street Fight)
I couldn't think of a Jet Li fight that could compete with these.

Top Ten Fight Scenes (Sword Fights) (Light Sabers Included)
1. Return of the Jedi (Final Battle)
2. Brotherhood of the Wolf (Pick one, this movie is wall to wall awesome)
3. Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves (Final Fight)
4. Gladiator (Lion Riddled Fight)
5. Rob Roy (Final Battle)
6. Princess Bride (First Battle of Dread Pirate Roberts and Inigo Montoya, Inigo Montoya vs Six Fingered Man)
7. Army of Darkness (Final Battle)
8. Star Wars Ep. 1 (Final Battle)
9. Monty Python and the Holy Grail (Black Knight vs. King Arthur)
10. Willow (Mad Mardigan vs Skull Face)

Top Ten Fight Scenes (Other Weapons)
1. Under Seige (Final Knife Fight)
2. The Patriot (Ax vs British Scene)
3. Chinese Connection (Nunchuck Fight in Dojo)
4. Pale Rider (Ax Handle Fight)
5. Aliens (Body Suit vs Queen Fight)
6. Pitch Black (Vin vs. Creature)
7. Beverly Hills Ninja (Fish Nunchucks Fight)
8. Shanghai Noon (Horseshoe on a rope fight)
9. Romeo Must Die (Fight Holding Aaliyah)
10. Matrix: Reloaded (Metal Bar Fight)

Top Ten Gun Fights
1. L.A. Confidential (Final Battle)
2. The Killer (Final Battle)
3. Way of the Gun (Final Battle)
4. Scarface (Final Battle)
5. Training Day (Apartment Fight)
6. Unforgiven (Final Battle)
7. Untouchables (Subway Shootout)
8. Tombstone (O.K. Corral)
9. Equilibrium (Final Battle)
10. Desperado (Bar Fight)

Wednesday, September 10, 2003

I could be a Producer
I was playing around on ChuckleHound which lets you create theoretical movies and tells you how they would fare. I added in some explanations of Cast Choices where necessary. I made a few serious ones, of things I would like to see.

Final Reckoning (R)
(Mystery/Revenge Fantasy)
Starring Christian Bale and Carla Gugino (Ex-Girlfriend, still romantic interest)
Also Featuring John C. McGinley (villian), Keith David (cop), Famke Janssen (cop), and Thora Birch (Daughter of villian)
Directed by Gore Verbinski
Screenplay by Luc Besson and Robert Rodriguez
Projected Budget Range: $40-49 Million
Planned Release Date: July
Projected Box Office Receipts:
$12.38 million (Opening Weekend)
$56.74 million (Total Domestic Gross)

Shark in the Dark (R)
(Adventure/Thriller/Horror)
Starring Leonardo DiCaprio and Shannon Elizabeth (All Characters are fighting the Shark in the Dark)
Also Featuring Ed Harris, Johnny Knoxville, Izabella Scorupco, and Bridget Fonda
Directed by Brett Ratner
Screenplay by Ted Elliott and John Logan
Projected Budget Range: $30-39 Million
Planned Release Date: August
Projected Box Office Receipts:
$14.57 million (Opening Weekend)
$66.17 million (Total Domestic Gross)

And a few ridiculous ones.

Exploding Heads (R)
(Adventure)
Starring Michael Clarke Duncan (Rogue Cop) and Elizabeth Hurley (FBI Agent)
Also Featuring Ving Rhames (Villian), Sylvester Stallone (FBI Agent), Sarah Silverman (Wise-Cracking Villian), and Charlize Theron (I don't really need her)
Directed by John Woo
Screenplay by Ted Elliott
Projected Budget Range: $90-99 Million
Planned Release Date: July
Projected Box Office Receipts:
$18.00 million (Opening Weekend)
$79.27 million (Total Domestic Gross)

My Love has Girth (PG-13)
(Romance/Comedy)
Starring Seth Green and Natalie Portman - (Love Interests)
Also Featuring Orlando Bloom (Best Friend), Clint Eastwood (Father) , Eliza Dushku (Portman's Best Friend), and Robin Wright Penn (Mother)
Directed by Ron Howard
Screenplay by John Logan
Projected Budget Range: $30-39 Million
Planned Release Date: February
Projected Box Office Receipts:
$10.36 million (Opening Weekend)
$79.25 million (Total Domestic Gross)

My Fist your Face (PG-13)
(Adventure/Buddy Cop)
Starring Vin Diesel (cop) and Salma Hayek (love interest for Vin)
Also Featuring Rob Schneider (cop), Tom Sizemore (villian), Thora Birch (young cop), and Pam Grier (Chief of Police)
Directed by Jay Roach
Screenplay by Tim Herlihy and Rob Schneider
Projected Budget Range: $50-59 Million
Planned Release Date: April
Projected Box Office Receipts:
$17.86 million (Opening Weekend)
$77.40 million (Total Domestic Gross)

Gelatinous Monster (R)
(Horror/Ghost Story)
Starring Hugh Jackman and Bridget Fonda - Heroes
Also Featuring Bob Hoskins (Creator of monster), DJ Qualls (yelping victim), Jennifer Love Hewitt, and Thora Birch
Directed by M. Night Shyamalan
Screenplay by M. Night Shyamalan
Projected Budget Range: $40-49 Million
Planned Release Date: October
Projected Box Office Receipts:
$16.58 million (Opening Weekend)
$64.52 million (Total Domestic Gross)

Kung-Fu Jew (PG-13)
(Adventure/Martial Arts/Comedy)
Starring Adam Sandler (Hero) and Amanda Detmer (Love Interest)
Also Featuring Jackie Chan (Mentor), Jet Li (Villian), and Michelle Rodriguez (villian)
Directed by John Woo
Screenplay by Jim Taylor
Projected Budget Range: $60-69 Million
Planned Release Date: December
Projected Box Office Receipts:
$18.00 million (Opening Weekend)
$75.38 million (Total Domestic Gross)

Juicy Humans (R)
(Horror/Vampire)
Starring Christian Bale (vampire) and Courteney Cox (Vamp Food)
Also Featuring Orlando Bloom (vamp killer 1), Ray Park (vamp killer 2), Fairuza Balk, and Famke Janssen
Directed by Sam Raimi
Screenplay by Peter Jackson
Projected Budget Range: $30-39 Million
Planned Release Date: October
Projected Box Office Receipts:
$10.35 million (Opening Weekend)
$74.03 million (Total Domestic Gross)

Although, none of mine are as funny as Dave's "Ravishing" movie
Bubba Ho-Tep, the strangest movie I have ever been dying to see.

"If you see one ELVIS VS. MUMMY movie this year...This Is It!" - (Actual Quote)

The premise is this, Elvis (Bruce Campbell) who is actually alive is stuck in a Retirement home. He had switched places with an impersonator who got fat and died, and then he was unable to rebecome him in the face of so many crazy impersonators. One of his buddies (Ossie Davis) is an elderly black man who thinks he is J.F.K., and the two of them fall under attack by Bubba Ho-Tep an ancient Egyptian god. These two fighting evil has got to be the most original thing I can think of, and the fact that it got made is astounding. From the sound of it, you would think it would be garbage but it scores a 100% on rottentomatoes.com and has been generally well received. I usually watch whatever Bruce Campbell makes including his made-for-tv stuff, and this is the first movie that I am really excited about from him in quite awhile.

Tuesday, September 09, 2003



Resident Evil:Apocalypse is in production and hopefully it will be another good blend of action/horror. This one will have two storylines one with Milla Jovovich and another for Jill Valentine (wearing the exact same outfit as the third game) . Oded Fehr appears somewhere too as a S.T.A.R.S operative.
Season 2 of 24 and Season 3 of The Family Guy both hit stores today
...and my apartment has both.

Season 1 of 24 is basically a smooth suspenseful 16 hour movie. Keifer Sutherland is on top of his game again and the supporting cast is mixed with skilled new faces and some wonderful cameos (Lou Diamond Phillips, Dennis Hopper). This show is a drug, I showed my friend the first two episodes and then he stayed up and watched the first 20 episodes before passing out. You need to see the first season, I'll tell you later if the second season is as sweet.

The Family Guy is pound for pound funnier and edgier than The Simpsons, which few people will admit because the Simpsons is like the Holy Star Wars trilogy of the TV world. But honestly, there are lots of Simpsons episodes and seasons that aren't that funny, and Family Guy has had few misses. Sadly though, Family was canceled after 3 seasons, although stellar sales of the DVD set may spawn a movie.

Monday, September 08, 2003

Top Five Cartoon Movies from my youth
1. Hoomania - "Aw No...Sluggards" A Claymation journey through Proverbs
2. Rikki Tiki Tavi - A wily mongoose battles the evil cobras of the world.
3. The Great Bear Scare - The brilliant Ted E. Bear inspires the town to fight back against the monsters from Monster Mountain
4. Fantastic Four vs. The Menace of Magneto - "A wooden gun?!?" The Fantastic Four outwit the Master of Magnetism
5. Daffy Duck's "Duck Twacy" - Inspired by a comic, Daffy daydreams the Mystery of the Missing Piggy Banks

Honorable mention for Teeny Tiny and the Witch Woman

I'm working on some links and pics, but I am having trouble finding any.
The Best Classic Horror Movie from Universal
1. The Invisible Man

Oh yeah, thats right. Frankenstein and Dracula got nothing on this one. And the scene were he skips through the park in just pants is priceless.
Top Ten Playstation 2 Games
1. Dynasty Warriors 4
2. Fatal Frame
3. SSX Tricky
4. Soul Caliber 2
5. Metal Gear Solid 2
6. Silent Hill 2
7. Tony Hawk 3
8. Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
9. Final Fantasy X
10. Tenchu: Wrath of Heaven

I skipped sports games (except the extreme sports) and first person shooters (all the good ones are on PC).
Jean Reno, I need you.

I want more movies featuring Jean Reno, there hasn't been a good US movie with him in it since Ronin in 1998, Just Visiting was good but not great. For those of you who don't know him he starred in Luc Besson's The Professional, and is one of the best French actors in existence. I've had to settle with some French movies like Wasabi and The Crimson Rivers, which were good but I want another movie that can stand next to The Professional. It's all I want for Christmas.
The Death Penalty, and the Bible Belt

I saw The Life of David Gale the other night, which is a mystery movie about a Reporter(Kate Winslet) who needs to clear a convicted rapist/murderer (Kevin Spacey) in four days before he is set for lethal injection. The climax reveals what you knew all along, but it makes you second guess it a few times. I'm not sure if the movie intended to speak out against lethal injection or just use it as a scenario for a mystery. The Texan Government gets the brunt of the anti-death penalty propaghanda mostly on the grounds of the Religious idea of an eye for an eye. The views of the movie didn't ruin the story which was good, we all know movies that failed at that I'm sure.

As a Christian who is near to completing a Bible Degree, I wanted to lay out the "Eye for an Eye" issue since Christians themselves are divided over it. It really depends upon understanding Theonomy, which is the way in which the Old Testament relates to the present day. Since the Bible was written as Progressive revelation, meaning that God's program was not all laid out at once but was built up over time, how should we today understand and apply the Old Testament and in this case specifically the Torah (First Five Books/Books of Moses). One view is that whatever is said in the Old Testament is to be maintained if it is repeated in the New Testament, another states that it is to be held unless repealed in the New Testament, and another says that it all applies with equal validity. The first is the one held by most Evangelical Christians who are schooled in the Bible, the second is held by most strong conservative churches like the Mennonites and some Presbyterians, and the third is held by all the idiot Christians who tarnish the religion with their protests and misguided causes. The first two views can be well supported Biblically and should probably be united when possible, but the third one will contradict itself endlessly. Since, it is not repeated and is repealed in the New Testament the idea of "An Eye for an Eye" is no longer a Christian Dogma that can be withheld Biblically. Jesus makes it clear several times in the gospels, the most clear example would be where He stops the crowd from stoning the woman who was to be condemned by Jewish law(John 8). Man, I went off on this more than I planned, I just hate the mindless Christians that somehow end up speaking for us all the time in the media.
Supporting Actor of the Week
John C. McGinley

There are so many good supporting actors that should be appreciated regularly and I plan to do so on my site. John C. McGinley is always an asset to a movie. Some of his best performances are in The Rock, Office Space, Car 54 Where Are You?, Get Carter, Platoon, Identity, Highway, Stealing Harvard, and The Pentagon Wars. He can also be seen regularly in the TV show Scrubs. He works great as both a tough guy and a comedic presence, and if I ever write a movie there will be a part in it specifically for him.

Ahhh, My Listicles

While at work I have nothing but time to waste so here is a list of dumb lists I thought up. If you think I missed someone crucial it’s because I went off the top of my head.

All Lists are in no particular order
Top Ten Movies Starring Sylvester Stallone
1. Rocky
2. Copland
3. Lock Up
4. F.I.S.T.
5. Tango and Cash
6. First Blood
7. Get Carter
8. Assassins
9. Rocky 3
10. Rambo: First Blood Part 2

Top Five Movies Featuring Sharks (Cameos Count)
1. Jaws
2. Jaws 2
3. Deep Blue Sea
4. The Beach
5. Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery

Top Ten Movies about Fighting Demons
1. Army of Darkness (I decided Deadites are Demons)
2. Fallen
3. Sleepy Hollow
4. Exorcist
5. Frailty
6. Dogma
7. Tribute (Music Video by Tenacious D)
8. Devil’s Advocate
9. Interview with the Vampire (If you read the books you know that this series of Vampires was spawned by a demon)
10. The Stand

Top Ten Movies where a kid saves the day
1. The People Under the Stairs
2. Home Alone
3. Choose your Harry Potter
4. Cloak and Dagger
5. Star Wars (Han Solo called him a kid, why not)
6. Labyrinth
7. Lost Boys
8. The Never-ending Story
9. The Shining
10. Akira

Top Three Blind Camera Gags
Shot where the camera pans into an object just as the character hits it.

1. The New Guy (Under the Bleachers Head Smack)
2. Black Sheep (The Cell Phone Range Sequence)
3. Dracula: Dead and Loving It (Rising from the Grave Chandelier Sequence)

Top Ten Comic Duos (Yeah, I skipped a bunch. I went for variety of style)
1. Gene Wilder and Richard Pryor (Silver Streak, Stir Crazy, Another You, See No Evil, Hear No Evil)
2. Abbott and Costello (duh)
3. David Spade and Chris Farley (Black Sheep, Tommy Boy)
4. John Cusack and Jeremy Piven (Grosse Point Blank, Say Anything, Serendipity)
5. Bill Murray and Harold Ramis (Ghostbusters 1+2, Stripes)
6. Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker (Rush Hour 1+2)
7. Jack Black and Kyle Gass (Tenacious D, movie due out soonish)
8. Mel Gibson and Danny Glover (Lethal Weapon 1-4)
9. Jay and Silent Bob (Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, Mallrats, Chasing Amy, Dogma)
10. Bob Odenkirk and David Cross (Mr.Show, Run Ronnie Run)

Top Ten Bald(ing) Actors (Not including people who wear toupee’s regularly, I am including people who are bald by their own choice)
1. Patrick Stewart
2. Kevin Spacey
3. Sean Connery
4. Nicholas Cage
5. Samuel L. Jackson
6. Bruce Willis
7. Danny DeVito
8. Ving Rhames
9. Ed Harris
10. Jean Reno
Video Game Review

Soul Caliber 2 (PS2, XBOX, Gamecube)
As the sequel to the excellent Dreamcast Soul Caliber which was a sequel to Playstation’s Soul Edge, this game is worth all the anticipation it garnered for its August release. This is the best fighting game in existence…period. Beautiful graphics, excellent gameplay, and a great cast of characters (Except the pathetic Heihachi from the PS2 release). Along with games from the Tekken series, this game thrives on real skill and strategy instead of special move memorization and the Bastard fighting style*. Play Tekken if you like the hand to hand fighting, play this to enjoy weaponry.

*The Bastard fighting style is to find the quick attack for whatever character you choose and do that one attack over and over without allowing the enemy to stand back up and fight. Although, this is still possible in Soul Caliber especially with Raphael and Necrid, it can be countered. Games such as Marvel VS Capcom, and the original Mortal Kombat and Street Fighter games are good examples of games where that is pretty much the only way to fight. You remember “Haduken” “Haduken” “Haduken” over and over. Man Street Fighter sucks.
Man, you know I want three!

As a child born in the Eighties I missed many great classics of film, so each week I rent 3 movies that I missed for some reason. They won’t always be old but usually at least one will be. This week I rented The Great Escape, The Grey Zone, and Hard Boiled. I didn’t intentionally pick two movies about Nazi imprisonment but since I did I will compare them with one another.

The Great Escape
The Great Escape is considered one of the best from Steve McQueen, and is usually listed as one of the best ensemble films of all time. The story is about the Allied troops that have been gathered up into one giant imprisonment camp during the Second World War, mostly on their daring attempts to escape. Surprisingly, it is a feel-good movie which didn’t quite fit with the setting of the movie. While most movies on the subject center in on the cruelty of the Nazis, this one had the Nazis depicted as foolish and almost friendly. The Dirty Dozen does a better job of balancing its humor while still maintaining the severity of their opposition. The acting is great with the best performances coming from Richard Attenborough and Steve McQueen, Honorable mention goes to Donald Pleasance, Gordon Jackson, and James Garner. It is worthy of its Classic trademark, but I couldn’t fully enjoy the good natured Nazis.

The Grey Zone
This movie was an art house release with a great ensemble cast which is what drew me to rent it. This one explores the depraved lives of the Jews who have taken positions to help the Nazis dispose of the bodies from the Death Camps in order to live a bit longer and more comfortably. This one is brutal and really lets you taste the bitter reality of having to sell out your own kind to death in order to stay alive. Within the camp they are planning an uprising, not to escape but to destroy the plant, because they are so deeply ashamed of their lives. More great performances here especially from Harvey Keitel as one of the head guards and David Arquette as one of the younger Jews in the camp. I was surprised by how well Arquette did, especially after seeing all his 1-800-Collect commercials and Ready to Rumble. Rounding out the cast is Steve Buscemi and Mira Sorvino. I would recommend it as a rental.

Hard Boiled
A John Woo classic to stand next to the equally good The Killer, which shares the same lead actor Chow Yun Fat who is the best Eastern actor to carry a gun. The story isn’t terribly important; the fight sequences are what you need to see this for. John Woo blends style and hardcore violence better than most and this is before he decided that gravity wasn’t real in Mission Impossible 2. Call a guys night out and watch this one.
This Week's Haul

On Saturdays I usually hit the local Flea Markets and Yard Sales for some good old movies cheap. This week was a good one with 6 movies found for less than 3 bucks each on VHS.

A Perfect World - Starring Kevin Costner and Clint Eastwood (who also directed) the story although a beat awkward was interesting and the play between Costner and the boy he kidnapped is just fun.

The Transformers Movie – This and the G.I.JOE movie are the best 80’s cartoon movies

Other People’s Money – A movie that works because Danny DeVito is one of the best.

A League of their Own – A decent feel-good movie from Penny Marshall during Tom Hanks funny period. And one of the few movies with Madonna in it that isn’t lousy.

Marked for Death – I am one of the few that enjoys a good Steven Seagal movie. Steven Seagal is the only action star that just wrecks house on everyone all the way through, while everyone else will start loosing a fight just for tension. Sometimes I just want to see the bad guys eat it hard.

Uncle Buck – John Candy is funnier here than in most of his movies, almost as good as Canadian Bacon.

Sunday, September 07, 2003

The Journey Begins

Struggling to fall asleep I laid awake reading my friend Dave's Blog Site, after little consideration I have created my own to share my thoughts with the world. Hopefully, at least two people will read it.

I created this site to offer my own read on the movies, since most critics are either too self-absorbed in their own brilliance or too critical of everything that gets released. While many movies do truly suck, most movies have something to offer that can be enjoyed. Ultimately, I hope to do far more promoting of good movies here than the harpooning of the poorly executed movies. Most of which you know to avoid anyway. Although I think that my wide array of tastes should offer something for everyone, I'm sure you will be able to detect my own preferences in genre and style as time goes on.

With all this said, I hope you enjoy my posts.

Dean

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